Hello dear friends~

I hope you are all good and well.
So the “talk” is about me, my art, my stories (Especially Grey is…), my ideas, beliefs and how I think.
I couldn’t pick a better day to post this.

I will appreciate the time any of you will spare to read this. If you care about my art and stories more than just the look of it, then I think you might want to continue reading to know more about it and me.

Those who are close to me know that I don’t like to share much about me and how I think. Maybe some of you noticed that I don’t like drama, arguments and debates over the internet. All the bashing, the flaming, name-calling and stuff is nothing that interest me. I believe everyone have their own beliefs and thoughts and I try to respect it. I’m no saint, I sometimes get into fights and debates, or well I did before, and sometimes I read a thing that totally piss me off and I impulsively react but for the most part, I try to keep my distance. So let’s not try to turn this into something more than i t is. I just want to clear my self and I don’t mean to attack any one/idea/artist/fandom/interest.

I spent some time going over the idea of posting this journal, but here I am, taking a leap of faith hoping those who will understand me will be more than who doesn’t.
Haters gonna hate anyway, so what’s the risk in saying what  I want to say?

The “talk” is about my Grey is… _{(and all of my other stories for the matter)} & Shounen Ai/Yaoi/Boys’Love/
Yes I need to talk about that.

I keep getting these comments about Black and White being TOO close… emotionally and physically, comments about the story being too yaoi-looking to be about just friends, comments about it giving shounen-ai vibes and all that.

It used to PISS ME OFF last year but right now I’m at this point where I don’t mind. I know the internet and how everything around the anime world is and I’m sure about myself and my art.

But I have to make it clear how it’s not yaoi/BL even though they’re THIS close, and I’m aiming this journal not to yaoi fans only but more to non-yaoi fans who liked when I stated it’s not BL then started having doubts about it when I started posting pics of Black and White being too close judging that I’m either fooling around, doesn’t really know what I want OR (the worst) that I’m trying to please the fans.

Those who followed me long enough know that I couldn’t care less about popularity, I draw what I  like and want. We all know the perfect ways to be popular here is to draw fanart or yaoi, or both together.
I don’t want anybody to flame me about this now, I watch over 1500 artists here and I love all kinds of art, whether it was fanart, original, digital, traditional, BL, Het or whatever.
Good art is good art whatever the topic.

I have issue with nude people, so that’s a topic I won’t enjoy regardless that is a whole art by itself. ^^;

So, no, I’m not writing the story according to what people like. I have the whole story written before I started drawing a line in the manga, and I am currently posting pages of chapter 2 while I’m working on chapter 8 which makes me 6 chapters ahead. If I get a comment about a certain thing a fan wishes for… then the next page happens to fulfill that wish, it’s just pure coincidence.

Sex:

So, what I’m gonna write next applies on every story I write. It’s what I like and what I will always write or have in my stories; strong friendships between two from the same sex, and that DOES exist, believe it or not.

As much as the media (TV, Music, storie, etc.) talks about sex and makes it this essential thing; there are some people who doesn’t think of it as much.
I, for one, couldn’t care less about all that, call me asexual, maybe I am, but it’s just not my interest in anyway, so you’ll never see anything related to it in my stories or art. I won’t deny there were times when I was influenced by a certain show/song/person and was curious enough to draw pics related to sex. People are weak at times that they would do anything to win a contest, make money or impress someone or even themselves and in my case it was mostly the last one. But I am more certain of what I want and like now.

Even if a time comes when I’d write a love story, I don’t think I would provide any scenes of a sexual nature. It’s just not in my book.
I love to draw love, hugs, closeness, cute feelings, caring, compassion and all the acts of love besides sex. That’s why you might find me writing a love story between a boy and a plant or believing that I’m fully content without a lover coz I have my art (crazy as it sounds)

Black and White, why this close? There CAN’T be such relationship!

Ok, I hear you.
I want to create one. Objections?

I do believe it does exist and I don’t really have to explain myself but let me defend for the sake of some of the “COME ON DUDE! This looks yaoi, they can’t be just friends. TOO MUCH PHYSICAL CONTACT!” comments.
Side Note: please do know the difference between yaoi and shounen-ai/BL. As fas as I know, none of the pics I posted look yaoi.
Ahhhh well, you haven’t seen a thing yet. And just like I’m not going to change my story to please fans, I’m not going to hold back on anything in fear of hateful judgmental people.

Closeness Justified:
-Cultural thing:

In my culture, it’s not that weird for guys to be close. Guys call each other “dear” “love” and many sweet words, they kiss on the cheek and hug in greeting, they walk with arms around shoulders, they joke and hit and punch and all naturally.
In some of the countries, males eskimo-kiss in greeting, it’s a natural thing.  

All people have emotions, some do express themselves, some don’t:

Including guys. Example; nothing wrong of a guy telling another that he loves him, or is being open with his feelings.

Relationships between lovers/married people/sexual partners isn’t always the strongest IMO
A person can love somebody MOST and need him MOST but isn’t the one he’s in a love relationship with.

People need physical contact, in happiness, in anger, in sadness… etc

“Grey is…” is a slice-of-life drama story that deals with very strong themes (Abuse, Suicide, Struggles with oneself, death, betrayal, etc.) Characters need to hit, need to cry, need to touch, hug in happiness, cling in sadness and all that.

Now, specifically related to Black and White:

I never drew such relationship between ANY two, like ever! It’s the strongest/closest/tightest relationship I ever created and I’m proud of it.
Black is a very emotional expressive character who’s gone through a lot and when he wants something he doesn’t really care for other people’s opinion; he just goes and grab whatever he wants, so expect anything from him.  He also is curious and likes to ask about everything and anything and maybe try it.
White is a very caring and supportive character who has been with Black all his life and he will do anything to make him feel better.
And I’m not going to change either personalities in fear of people’s reactions. It is after all; my story. And if there is only one person who can understand it as I’m writing it, I guess there is hope for others to, too.
There are jokes, pranks, good times, bad times, there is a life between the two and I’m not going to remove or hide any part.
Bromance is the best term?
Or well let this tell you what it is: www.youtube.com/watch?v=lL4L4U…
And this coz its ;A; www.youtube.com/watch?v=HTGv8x…
/sobs
/bromance sucker
/scrubs sucker

One more thing;

There is a term called “Slashing” and another called “Shipping” which I can’t control. Some of my closest friends make comments about that to me, slash/ship Black and White, and that is out of my control.
I explained myself to them, some understood completely and took the story as it is (<3), some didn’t and some just like to tease me about it (e_____e but I still love you >_>; ). I receive questions and fangirly comments on pages and formspring hinting about this and many have seen that I’m open-minded about it.

It’s not a matter of ME loving or hating BL. It’s just that it’s not included in this story.
I wonder how many are still reading, but I thank you a lot. I needed to put this up for all my watcher and to myself as a reminder whenever I feel weak or afraid of sharing something.

Now after I said all this, I feel like a huge burden has be moved from my chest. I owed it to my art I guess, and to all of you who supported me from the very beginning.

Thanks again~
Have a lovely day!

PS: what pushed me to actually write this in the end was the TV show; friends. While I was watching episode 03 season 10; Joey and Rachel weren’t able too comfortable with being lovers and then after wondering about it and asking chandler if it was hard for him and Monica to become ones which wasn’t; Joey says “Seems like we’re better friends than they are” for not being able to become a couple. Which was really cute.