About Childhood, growing up and physical proximity?


Lots of stories, love stories especially in manga, show you two characters as childhood friends then one starts to develop feelings for another during puberty. Often, what happens is that after a cut in the friendship through moving or just drifting apart, one can romanticise that childhood to the point of developing these feelings once the two reunite.

When I used to say to some of my friends online at the beginning of the story, that Black and White just can’t be lovers, one theorized (like many other readers), it’s because White is not real. To which one of my other friends, “that’s not convincing enough. people ship Sora and Roxas.” 😛 

haha fair enough. But when I say ‘can’t’, I just mean they just spent way too much time together to see one another though that lens.

Black spent most of his teen-hood sleeping over at White’s place. White slept over at Black’s often (in the studio) so it always felt like they’re brothers under one roof. I mentioned once one of the two questioning their feelings towards the other (feelings should be enough hint which of the two really), because of peer and environment pressure? But even that was discussed casually. Because they’ve been close all their time growing up.

I like to believe there is a threshold in proximity that when crossed without developing feelings of romantic love and attraction, you simply can’t see a person but as a family member.

Even in married couples, who build a relationship that is intimate and sexual, they reach a point after years of living together, where they start creating time and events to keep the romance. It’s not love staling, or choices made wrong. 

Same goes for very old couples. When people imagine growing old with someone, they imagine a silent walk, a friend to live with, something casual and intimate. (Media’s need to sexualise everything is ruining that though I think. but that’s a topic for another day)

Of course when a relationship is romantic and involves physical sexual  intimacy (when done right) it stays passionate and filled with romance no matter the time spent, and is different from just two close people growing old, because it has a foundation of real intimate memories that keeps the roots and the fruits. So people in a romantic relationship need to learn how to poke and use those memories and feelings to keep the love alive. Why do you think there is period between dating and marriage called engagement? it’s the time to build those stones, I believe.

(it’s why I don’t believe in lovers becoming true friends but that’s a topic for yet another different day.)

I’m no one to talk about romance in depth. What I know is just from my observations and hours of comparison between romantic and platonic love, a few short-lived personal feelings.

I’m getting side-tracked with the psychology and nature of relationship. Let’s get back to the bromance.

What i meant to write here is…

i dunno anymore.

I guess I wrote what I’ve been thinking about, got sidetracked and now I’m just looking for a way to end this post and publish.

Ah. here is a good way to end this;

A prime example I give about best friends growing up together closely is from back in the days of One Tree Hill.
If you’ve watched that show, understood Lucas and Haley’s friendship, kept getting worried one would be hiding a crush for the other, or some episode one would develop romantic feelings, then was so grateful and satisfied when that didn’t happen, then this post was a tl;dr for you because this two’s relationship sums it up.

[now I feel like recording this and making a video of it. it’s a script lol]

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